Had my last scan of this cycle this morning. Retrieval is scheduled for Tuesday. This means I'll be taking my trigger shot Sunday night which will be day 14. This is identical to my last cycle, and one day ahead of my first cycle.
This morning I woke up with a horrible lower back pain on the side of my ovary. I'm sure the enlarged ovary isn't helping any because I also feel pretty bloated in the stomach now, but the truth is, I get my fair share of lower back pain so I wasn't overly alarmed. I was annoyed though because what I usually do when I have this pain is some yoga stretching which is mostly spinal twisting. Given that twisting is a big no-no with an enlarged ovary, I've been suffering back pain all day now. It's not very nice. And of course I can't take any pain killers either. Ugh.
Saw the director of the clinic again this time as my normal doctor was fully booked. I've seen him once already this cycle so I didn't mind too much, although I would probably prefer to see the same doctor throughout. He had a good look and measure of the follicles and the ovary (I think because I also mentioned the back pain). Apparently everything is growing at pretty much an identical pace to the previous cycles so I suppose it's good that I'm reasonably reliable.
He counted six good sized follicles with a couple more behind, so that was good. I was watching the scan as he looked and it was difficult to tell sometimes where one started and another stopped. When they are side by side it's easy, but when they're on top of each other it's not as clear. At any rate, it looks like I have a bit more follicles than last cycle, although obviously they may not all contain eggs. I also have three more days of stimulating. So hopefully it will all go as previous and I get a reasonable number of eggs.
So having the retrieval day, my next order of business was to find someone to collect me from the clinic. I still think this is one of the more demoralizing aspects to egg freezing. My collection is on a Tuesday morning. So I have to ask someone to take off work to meet me. I don't have a partner where it would sort of be their obligation. It's not always easy. I've was pretty lucky the first two cycles but this one wasn't so easy. I had to call and email a few people before I finally found someone who could do it. I had talked to the receptionist about if I really couldn't find anyone and I did have a back-up plan to take a taxi home. It would have worked out either way, but I guess what I'm saying is, it's not nice to feel alone in the midst of this. It's just one more thing you don't really need.
Anyway, it's sorted.
And I'm probably particularly feeling grumpy because of the hormones. I can tell that I'm definitely grumpy!
I have enough drugs to see me through so that was all good. I'll end up with one 225 dose of Gonal-F left in the pen but that means I completely saved money by buying the drugs externally. The only thing I had to get from the clinic was the Voltarol suppository, but they give me that for free, so not a problem. Only four more days of injections left! I'm actually pretty excited that this is almost over!
In other news mulling over in my head, over on the eggsurance forum there has been a woman posting about how she tried to use her frozen eggs. I'm not sure of all the details, but it seems like she had 9 frozen eggs in total, it resulted in two embryos, both of which she implanted, but both of which were miscarried recently. That was a bit depressing to hear. I know there are a lot of factors that go into all of this and you can't really compare yourself to one person on a forum, but I'm just conscious that I'm not going to end up with that much many more eggs than she had. I guess it's important to remember that none of this is any sort of guarantee.
It's not worth thinking about it too much. I feel bad for the woman. There are other options, and I hope she feels satisfied that she did what she could, but it's definitely a blow.
Anyway.
Unless something remarkable happens between now and retrieval, I'll next write to say how it all went. I have an acupuncture appointment on Saturday which I'm oddly looking forward to. You'd think I'd be fed up with needles by now!!
Showing posts with label scan. Show all posts
Showing posts with label scan. Show all posts
24 October 2013
21 October 2013
Cycle 3: Day 8
Had my scan this morning. Nothing eventful to report as it all seems to be very routine now. The doctor measured 5 follicles which are 'growing' and 3 that are 'just behind'. I've also now dropped from 300 Gonal-F to 225 and will stay on the lower dose.
I'll be honest. The numbers are slightly disappointing at this stage. As I got 6 eggs from my first cycle and 4 from my second, even though I've been on a higher dose of drugs, this cycle seems to be smack in the middle so far, and that's assuming I get an egg out of every follicle. I was definitely hoping for more. But we're still only about halfway.
That's the other thing- the doctor had said that due to the higher drug dose, the cycle might be shorter. But at the moment it looks like it's going to be just about the same amount of days. So I have another seven days to go give or take.
It is times like this where I do get a bit frustrated that I am not convinced that the UK clinics are using the best drugs or the best protocols or doing everything they can. On the eggsurance forum, most of the women are from the States and it's like we're doing completely different things. Part of me wonders if I wouldn't be getting more eggs on a different regime. But as per usual, this sort of thinking is vaguely pointless. I have to remember that my clinic has some of the highest pregnancy and live birth results in the UK and not because they're selective and turn anyone away. Newer stuff and more tests isn't necessarily better. But I am used to a system of having more information and more discussion. That doesn't mean it's actually more useful, it might just mean I feel differently about everything.
But I go back to this all being a stressful process (and 7 days of hormone injections later, it's not entirely surprising I'm starting to feel a bit anxious). There are so many unknowns about what I'm doing that it makes me desperate for some small inkling of certainty. And I'm just not going to get it. Who knows if these eggs will fertilize? Who knows if I will ever be in a position to fertilize them?! There's just a lot of questions that I can't answer at this stage.
Oh, and I should also say that since I have a dermoid cyst on my ovary, it's probably not at top form either. Every time I see the cyst on the scan it just annoys me. Who knows how it affects that side of my ovary on which it lives parasitically? So really, I'm not complaining. Or, I am complaining, but I'm more complaining about the unfairness of life, the fact that I find myself in this position at all, and that life hasn't turned out the way I thought it would.
As far as the cycle goes, really, everything is fine so far.
I'll be honest. The numbers are slightly disappointing at this stage. As I got 6 eggs from my first cycle and 4 from my second, even though I've been on a higher dose of drugs, this cycle seems to be smack in the middle so far, and that's assuming I get an egg out of every follicle. I was definitely hoping for more. But we're still only about halfway.
That's the other thing- the doctor had said that due to the higher drug dose, the cycle might be shorter. But at the moment it looks like it's going to be just about the same amount of days. So I have another seven days to go give or take.
It is times like this where I do get a bit frustrated that I am not convinced that the UK clinics are using the best drugs or the best protocols or doing everything they can. On the eggsurance forum, most of the women are from the States and it's like we're doing completely different things. Part of me wonders if I wouldn't be getting more eggs on a different regime. But as per usual, this sort of thinking is vaguely pointless. I have to remember that my clinic has some of the highest pregnancy and live birth results in the UK and not because they're selective and turn anyone away. Newer stuff and more tests isn't necessarily better. But I am used to a system of having more information and more discussion. That doesn't mean it's actually more useful, it might just mean I feel differently about everything.
But I go back to this all being a stressful process (and 7 days of hormone injections later, it's not entirely surprising I'm starting to feel a bit anxious). There are so many unknowns about what I'm doing that it makes me desperate for some small inkling of certainty. And I'm just not going to get it. Who knows if these eggs will fertilize? Who knows if I will ever be in a position to fertilize them?! There's just a lot of questions that I can't answer at this stage.
Oh, and I should also say that since I have a dermoid cyst on my ovary, it's probably not at top form either. Every time I see the cyst on the scan it just annoys me. Who knows how it affects that side of my ovary on which it lives parasitically? So really, I'm not complaining. Or, I am complaining, but I'm more complaining about the unfairness of life, the fact that I find myself in this position at all, and that life hasn't turned out the way I thought it would.
As far as the cycle goes, really, everything is fine so far.
17 October 2013
Cycle 3: Day 4
Had my scan this morning. There was a fuck up at the clinic- as my appointment was just not on the system. I showed up, but they didn't have me down and of course the doctors were fully booked. I had scheduled a counseling appointment for after my scan, so I had that and then the clinic director (not my normal doctor) saw me. So it was okay in the end, although I would have preferred to see my regular doctor, there are only 3 doctors and I always see a doctor so it's not that big a deal. I suppose it's just good luck though that I'm a full time student and could waste my entire morning instead of being done by 10:30 like I'd planned.
So scan reporting first. The doctor saw 7-8 follicles, they're all still small, only about 6.5mm. He's keeping me on the 300 Gonal-F for three more days and then I drop down to 225. My next scan is on Monday. I also start adding the Cetrotide tonight. Got to keep hold those little growing eggs! So really nothing else to discuss about the scan. All is regular. Continue on course.
The counseling session was interesting. I really think it's something I should have done during my first cycle. I did a lot of thinking and working through stuff on my own (some of it's on here). So this was a bit more like me reporting to someone else about the process I feel I've gone through. You know- first having to face up to the whole children issue when I always thought it would vaguely 'happen some day' and suddenly realizing that 'some day' was really on a very limited time scale. Then having to process what it might mean if I don't find a partner in the next couple of years and whether or not I'd be willing to have a child on my own (I would). Of course that comes with no small amount of sadness and guilt and stress. I also talked about how coming to these decisions has changed my view of the future about things like what job I want to take after I finish the PhD as I am thinking about things like maternity cover.
I've made another appointment to see her after this cycle finishes and when I put this egg freezing chapter of my life to bed for now. So I will report back on how that goes. Overall though, I thought it was really good to talk to someone, I just feel a bit dense for not doing it sooner.
So scan reporting first. The doctor saw 7-8 follicles, they're all still small, only about 6.5mm. He's keeping me on the 300 Gonal-F for three more days and then I drop down to 225. My next scan is on Monday. I also start adding the Cetrotide tonight. Got to keep hold those little growing eggs! So really nothing else to discuss about the scan. All is regular. Continue on course.
The counseling session was interesting. I really think it's something I should have done during my first cycle. I did a lot of thinking and working through stuff on my own (some of it's on here). So this was a bit more like me reporting to someone else about the process I feel I've gone through. You know- first having to face up to the whole children issue when I always thought it would vaguely 'happen some day' and suddenly realizing that 'some day' was really on a very limited time scale. Then having to process what it might mean if I don't find a partner in the next couple of years and whether or not I'd be willing to have a child on my own (I would). Of course that comes with no small amount of sadness and guilt and stress. I also talked about how coming to these decisions has changed my view of the future about things like what job I want to take after I finish the PhD as I am thinking about things like maternity cover.
I've made another appointment to see her after this cycle finishes and when I put this egg freezing chapter of my life to bed for now. So I will report back on how that goes. Overall though, I thought it was really good to talk to someone, I just feel a bit dense for not doing it sooner.
13 October 2013
Cycle 3: Day 0
My period has arrived this morning so tomorrow will be my first shot of my third and last cycle. I don't know if it's due to the acupuncture or the natural fluctuations of life, but my period seems heavier and a brighter red. I swear I've never had much interest in the qualities of my period. Getting all involved in your fertility does strange things to you!
I had a doctor's appointment on Friday for my pre-cycle scan. Everything looks okay. There were 7 good follicles on my ovary. My cyst looks to be about the same size. I asked if the seven we were looking at were what we had to work with for this cycle. The doctors said that some of them will go away, but some smaller ones will emerge and it's a good start. I think it's similar to the past two cycles, so that's okay.
So tomorrow I'm on 300 Gonal-F and on day 4 I add the Cetrotide. I'm also going to schedule my next scan for day 4 so that's Thursday. As we are changing the drug dose this cycle, it may need to be more closely monitored. The doctor said he might reduce it ond ay 4 or might keep it the same, so we'll see what happens.
I also paid for this cycle which really hurt the bank balance but it is what it is. When I was paying, I again flagged the issue of the 'follow-up appointment' charge, as I've now been charged twice for it. This time, she went to speak to the clinic director who said that it is definitely not included. So I told her that I thought this was really unreasonable. She said the only time they do a 'free' appointment is in the case of a failed IVF cycle. But I argued that in that case, firstly, the couple comes in one more time after the retrieval so gets to speak to the doctor, and isn't all drugged up and also secondly, as I knew I was going to do at least two cycles, it was fairly obvious that there was a mandatory 'in between appointment' and it was shit to be charged for it. She said she would raise it at the next internal meeting, in the meantime however, I'm out the extra money. I mean fine, in the grand scheme of things it's a small proportion of the money, but I'd rather they bump the overall fee by 100 pounds and then include it then dump it on you like that. It's annoying. And what you don't want to be, in an emotional and hormonally charged process, is annoyed by things that seem really stupid.
I also learned that my clinic has been bought by/has joined a larger network of IVF clinics in the UK. I'm not sure it makes any sort of difference as it seems more of a higher level management issue and each clinic seems to be independently run. But I suppose it can't be a bad thing in the long run, particularly if in a couple years time I'm not in London but somewhere else in the UK, it might be easier to use a local related clinic then go back down to London but that's a long way away to be thinking about. I suppose although it's interesting, it really doesn't seem to impact me at all.
The other thing I'm looking forward to now that this cycle is starting is getting my fridge space back! This is more for my non-UK/European visitors but having had my drug delivery a couple of weeks ago, it's put a serious limit on my fridge space! I have a flatmate, and she gets the bottom half of the fridge, so as you can see from the picture, space has been a little tight!
Anyway, that's all the news from here. I'll keep things updated as this cycle goes.
I had a doctor's appointment on Friday for my pre-cycle scan. Everything looks okay. There were 7 good follicles on my ovary. My cyst looks to be about the same size. I asked if the seven we were looking at were what we had to work with for this cycle. The doctors said that some of them will go away, but some smaller ones will emerge and it's a good start. I think it's similar to the past two cycles, so that's okay.
So tomorrow I'm on 300 Gonal-F and on day 4 I add the Cetrotide. I'm also going to schedule my next scan for day 4 so that's Thursday. As we are changing the drug dose this cycle, it may need to be more closely monitored. The doctor said he might reduce it ond ay 4 or might keep it the same, so we'll see what happens.
I also paid for this cycle which really hurt the bank balance but it is what it is. When I was paying, I again flagged the issue of the 'follow-up appointment' charge, as I've now been charged twice for it. This time, she went to speak to the clinic director who said that it is definitely not included. So I told her that I thought this was really unreasonable. She said the only time they do a 'free' appointment is in the case of a failed IVF cycle. But I argued that in that case, firstly, the couple comes in one more time after the retrieval so gets to speak to the doctor, and isn't all drugged up and also secondly, as I knew I was going to do at least two cycles, it was fairly obvious that there was a mandatory 'in between appointment' and it was shit to be charged for it. She said she would raise it at the next internal meeting, in the meantime however, I'm out the extra money. I mean fine, in the grand scheme of things it's a small proportion of the money, but I'd rather they bump the overall fee by 100 pounds and then include it then dump it on you like that. It's annoying. And what you don't want to be, in an emotional and hormonally charged process, is annoyed by things that seem really stupid.
I also learned that my clinic has been bought by/has joined a larger network of IVF clinics in the UK. I'm not sure it makes any sort of difference as it seems more of a higher level management issue and each clinic seems to be independently run. But I suppose it can't be a bad thing in the long run, particularly if in a couple years time I'm not in London but somewhere else in the UK, it might be easier to use a local related clinic then go back down to London but that's a long way away to be thinking about. I suppose although it's interesting, it really doesn't seem to impact me at all.
The other thing I'm looking forward to now that this cycle is starting is getting my fridge space back! This is more for my non-UK/European visitors but having had my drug delivery a couple of weeks ago, it's put a serious limit on my fridge space! I have a flatmate, and she gets the bottom half of the fridge, so as you can see from the picture, space has been a little tight!
Anyway, that's all the news from here. I'll keep things updated as this cycle goes.
27 June 2013
Cycle 2: Day 15
So yesterday was a big day! Sorry to be a day behind but I got home and the phone company had shut off all the phones in my building which meant no easy internet.
Anyway, yesterday was scan day. Back to my regular doctor. Had a good scan and a good chat with him. The decision was made to trigger, so my collection is tomorrow (Friday). That's one day short of the last cycle but pretty much the same. I have 4 large follicles and any further stimulation could cause me to lose them. I may lose one already but we'll see. There are also 3-4 follicles just squeaking past 11mm. Apparently that's the threshold for finding mature eggs. So they will sweep all of them in the hopes of finding some. But I guess I should be looking for about 4 eggs tomorrow and anything more would be great and anything less will make me depressed and then I'll have to get over it.
So my appointment is at noon tomorrow. This meant I took only Cetrotide last night before 10:30 (I took it around 9:30, and I did it in a restaurant bathroom. Not ideal but it was all rather short notice and I figured that was better than cancelling my plans.). Then at precisely 11:30 at night I did the Ovitrelle injection. This was a different system than the one I got on my first cycle. This one came in a pen just like the Gonal-F so super easy. Not that the pre-filled syringe wasn't easy as well. I like injections that are easy.
And now I wait. Today no injections. No food or drink past midnight. On the first cycle my collection was early in the morning, so it was easy not to do food or drink. This time I have to wait out half a day which is going to be a bit more challenging although obviously not nearly impossible. Just annoying really. Also no deodorant or anything so I'll take a shower before I go and hope it's not too warm out. Oh, and of course there's the lovely Voltarol suppository that I just need to "pop in" before heading to the clinic. Fun times.
I've arranged a friend to come meet me and go home with me. Much easier this time as the first person I asked could do it. And she's super sweet, she asked me what I wanted as some comfort food so she'd make it for me when we get back to mine. Macaroni and cheese, you are mine all mine!
In other news I learned how I get moved from the procedure room to the recovery room. Apparently they wheel in the recovery room bed and slide you across. That makes sense. I knew it wasn't the same bed! I also asked about follow up appointments. Apparently the reason I got charged for the last one is I had a scan. A talking follow up appointment is free, but the scan costs. I still find that slightly annoying, especially since I was "feeling" my ovary and I think it's reasonable aftercare to have a look and make sure nothing is wrong. But this time I know, or rather, expect that my ovary will take a while to get back to "normal" so I won't have a scan after but I will make a follow up appointment to discuss what the next steps are. If I do get 4 eggs I'll have 10 on ice. That's really not enough for me to feel comfortable. But I can probably only afford one more cycle. So we'll see.
The only differences between last cycle and this cycle other than my taking conception vitamins was one less day of norethisterone prior to stimulation. There haven't been any other impact factors. I mean, other than I'm stressed, but I'm pretty sure I was stressed for the first cycle. And I mean "life" stressed not egg freezing stressed. Meh. It is what it is! I'm doing the best I can! (Repeat).
Oh, the other thing I talked about with the doctor was in vitro maturation of eggs that aren't mature. He wasn't in favor saying the results are really generally poor and in fact as a clinic they are so underwhelmed by the success of in vitro matured eggs they don't offer it. Again, who am I to argue with the doctor? Their success rates as a clinic are high. I'm sure that it does work for some people, but I guess they look at it as an overall benefit and don't see it as panning out. So one less thing for me to consider. That's fine. I'm okay with that.
So anyway, depending on when I have home internet again, I'll update with the results. Nothing to do now but wait! (And drink gallons of water.)
Anyway, yesterday was scan day. Back to my regular doctor. Had a good scan and a good chat with him. The decision was made to trigger, so my collection is tomorrow (Friday). That's one day short of the last cycle but pretty much the same. I have 4 large follicles and any further stimulation could cause me to lose them. I may lose one already but we'll see. There are also 3-4 follicles just squeaking past 11mm. Apparently that's the threshold for finding mature eggs. So they will sweep all of them in the hopes of finding some. But I guess I should be looking for about 4 eggs tomorrow and anything more would be great and anything less will make me depressed and then I'll have to get over it.
So my appointment is at noon tomorrow. This meant I took only Cetrotide last night before 10:30 (I took it around 9:30, and I did it in a restaurant bathroom. Not ideal but it was all rather short notice and I figured that was better than cancelling my plans.). Then at precisely 11:30 at night I did the Ovitrelle injection. This was a different system than the one I got on my first cycle. This one came in a pen just like the Gonal-F so super easy. Not that the pre-filled syringe wasn't easy as well. I like injections that are easy.
And now I wait. Today no injections. No food or drink past midnight. On the first cycle my collection was early in the morning, so it was easy not to do food or drink. This time I have to wait out half a day which is going to be a bit more challenging although obviously not nearly impossible. Just annoying really. Also no deodorant or anything so I'll take a shower before I go and hope it's not too warm out. Oh, and of course there's the lovely Voltarol suppository that I just need to "pop in" before heading to the clinic. Fun times.
I've arranged a friend to come meet me and go home with me. Much easier this time as the first person I asked could do it. And she's super sweet, she asked me what I wanted as some comfort food so she'd make it for me when we get back to mine. Macaroni and cheese, you are mine all mine!
In other news I learned how I get moved from the procedure room to the recovery room. Apparently they wheel in the recovery room bed and slide you across. That makes sense. I knew it wasn't the same bed! I also asked about follow up appointments. Apparently the reason I got charged for the last one is I had a scan. A talking follow up appointment is free, but the scan costs. I still find that slightly annoying, especially since I was "feeling" my ovary and I think it's reasonable aftercare to have a look and make sure nothing is wrong. But this time I know, or rather, expect that my ovary will take a while to get back to "normal" so I won't have a scan after but I will make a follow up appointment to discuss what the next steps are. If I do get 4 eggs I'll have 10 on ice. That's really not enough for me to feel comfortable. But I can probably only afford one more cycle. So we'll see.
The only differences between last cycle and this cycle other than my taking conception vitamins was one less day of norethisterone prior to stimulation. There haven't been any other impact factors. I mean, other than I'm stressed, but I'm pretty sure I was stressed for the first cycle. And I mean "life" stressed not egg freezing stressed. Meh. It is what it is! I'm doing the best I can! (Repeat).
Oh, the other thing I talked about with the doctor was in vitro maturation of eggs that aren't mature. He wasn't in favor saying the results are really generally poor and in fact as a clinic they are so underwhelmed by the success of in vitro matured eggs they don't offer it. Again, who am I to argue with the doctor? Their success rates as a clinic are high. I'm sure that it does work for some people, but I guess they look at it as an overall benefit and don't see it as panning out. So one less thing for me to consider. That's fine. I'm okay with that.
So anyway, depending on when I have home internet again, I'll update with the results. Nothing to do now but wait! (And drink gallons of water.)
24 June 2013
Cycle 2: Day 12
Had another scan today. Still at about 6 follicles or so. Two of them are larger and could be collected but the doctor is hoping the other four will grow and catch up. I had a good talk with this doctor today. I said that I was feeling a bit discouraged about the lower follicle count compared to the first cycle. She told me that I really had no reason to be discouraged. That it was a reasonable outcome for someone of my age and with one ovary. And that I was responding well to the medication. She said that when they usually see women it's because they are having fertility problems, and I don't even know if I have any problems at all. She reiterated that it's really a lot about the egg quality. She told me she's seen women who get over ten eggs and none are good quality and another woman who came and only got one egg and then she got pregnant. Apparently they've also used frozen eggs successfully. Although they were donor eggs (and so most likely younger than my eggs) there were two frozen and they got a single pregnancy. So all of that was good. She also mentioned that I might want to take advantage of the free counseling that the clinic offers. I mean, I'm not entirely sure what a counselor can tell me. I sort of know what the deal is, it's just stressful. On the other hand, I feel a lot better having talked to the doctor and so maybe it would help to talk to the counselor and considering it's free, why the heck not?
I also asked the doctor about the protocol they use compared to the ones I hear about from the other egg freezers I know in the States. It seems like the UK protocol is much simpler- less drugs and almost no blood work other than the initial blood work. The doctor told me that they've looked at all the results so far from these procedures and they feel they simply aren't necessary. Obviously each doctor will have a different opinion but I do feel good that they at least keep up with these things. My clinic is one of the best in the UK with high results to prove it. They have to know something right about what they're doing.
In the meantime I continue on the same schedule- 225 Gonal-F and .25 Cetrotide. My next scan is Wednesday and collection will probably be Friday or maybe Saturday but I'll know for sure after the next scan. Seems like I'm on the same time schedule as the first cycle. Oh, and I did say something about how I felt like it was along time and she assured me that this is not a long time. She said some people take 3-4 weeks, and that's a long cycle!
I also asked the doctor about the protocol they use compared to the ones I hear about from the other egg freezers I know in the States. It seems like the UK protocol is much simpler- less drugs and almost no blood work other than the initial blood work. The doctor told me that they've looked at all the results so far from these procedures and they feel they simply aren't necessary. Obviously each doctor will have a different opinion but I do feel good that they at least keep up with these things. My clinic is one of the best in the UK with high results to prove it. They have to know something right about what they're doing.
In the meantime I continue on the same schedule- 225 Gonal-F and .25 Cetrotide. My next scan is Wednesday and collection will probably be Friday or maybe Saturday but I'll know for sure after the next scan. Seems like I'm on the same time schedule as the first cycle. Oh, and I did say something about how I felt like it was along time and she assured me that this is not a long time. She said some people take 3-4 weeks, and that's a long cycle!
21 June 2013
Cycle 2: Day 9
So back from my scan and of course I am depressed. There just aren't as many follicles as last time. The doctor (not my normal doctor) measured 6 although I think I saw at least one or two more. One is way out ahead so it probably won't last the duration. At this time last cycle I think I had at least 12-14 follicles showing and I only got 6 eggs. I'm steeling myself to get a low collection number.
Of course this is upsetting. Firstly, it's upsetting because it's all conjecture. Each follicle COULD yield an egg and I could do just as well as last cycle, I just don't BELIEVE that is what is going to happen. So that sort of sucks. If I go on a 50% yield, I'm looking at a collection of 3. Of course any is better than nothing.
This is what I keep telling myself. I mean, what am I getting so upset about? This is where my fertility is at right now. If I was trying to get pregnant, this is what it would be. If I wait around for when I hope to have children, it's going to be worse. The only thing I can be doing right now is this, and this is what my body produces. Any frozen egg is better than no frozen eggs. But it is so hard to not want to place blame or look for some sort of 'answer' to why it's not as good as I want it to be.
I recently answered some questions for an interview on egg freezing in an Australian magazine and the interviewer asked me if I wish I'd done this sooner. Yes. Absolutely, 100% yes. It's hard not to feel like I've let my best years go. Obviously when I was younger I had hope that things would just work out but that's not what's happened. So now, at almost 39 I just feel annoyed that I didn't know about this sooner, didn't do it sooner, let all those better eggs go sooner....
Not that any of that is productive. The only productive thing that I can do right now is exactly what I'm doing. I need to just try to stay focused on that and not let myself get worked up about things that are completely out of my control.
But it's hard.
Anyway. I'm sticking to the same dose for injections. Next scan is Monday with again not my usual doctor but not the one I just saw either, instead the one I saw at the start of my cycle (which I think covers all the doctors because I think there is only the three). I'll update here again after the scan.
Of course this is upsetting. Firstly, it's upsetting because it's all conjecture. Each follicle COULD yield an egg and I could do just as well as last cycle, I just don't BELIEVE that is what is going to happen. So that sort of sucks. If I go on a 50% yield, I'm looking at a collection of 3. Of course any is better than nothing.
This is what I keep telling myself. I mean, what am I getting so upset about? This is where my fertility is at right now. If I was trying to get pregnant, this is what it would be. If I wait around for when I hope to have children, it's going to be worse. The only thing I can be doing right now is this, and this is what my body produces. Any frozen egg is better than no frozen eggs. But it is so hard to not want to place blame or look for some sort of 'answer' to why it's not as good as I want it to be.
I recently answered some questions for an interview on egg freezing in an Australian magazine and the interviewer asked me if I wish I'd done this sooner. Yes. Absolutely, 100% yes. It's hard not to feel like I've let my best years go. Obviously when I was younger I had hope that things would just work out but that's not what's happened. So now, at almost 39 I just feel annoyed that I didn't know about this sooner, didn't do it sooner, let all those better eggs go sooner....
Not that any of that is productive. The only productive thing that I can do right now is exactly what I'm doing. I need to just try to stay focused on that and not let myself get worked up about things that are completely out of my control.
But it's hard.
Anyway. I'm sticking to the same dose for injections. Next scan is Monday with again not my usual doctor but not the one I just saw either, instead the one I saw at the start of my cycle (which I think covers all the doctors because I think there is only the three). I'll update here again after the scan.
18 June 2013
Cyle 2: Day 6
So I just got back from my first scan after starting the stimulation. As per last cycle, my follicles are slow starters. The doctor measured 7. He also measured my cyst, which does not appear to be growing. I was a bit disappointed by 7 and thought that was less than the last cycle. He checked and said at the first scan in the first cycle, he had noted 8. So yeah, one less so far. He didn't seem worried though and said that I just seem to have slow starters and it's too early to be able to tell anything yet. He's keeping me on the same drug protocol as last time. So I guess that means I'm definitely in for a long stimulation cycle. And I'm preparing myself for a low number collection.
I think what's hard about the medication is how quickly I can get upset. I honestly don't notice any other side effects of the stimulation drugs. But when something happens that could possibly be upsetting, I feel like it's devastating. That could also be because this process is stressful in general. Obviously what anyone who is doing this wants is the most mature eggs as possible. It's frustrating to know you can't really do anything about it. What the scan shows is what your body has.
I keep reminding myself that if I had two ovaries, these would be really good results for someone who is almost 39. In fact, if I was getting twice the number, I would be pleased. So it's not really my body at fault. I'm simply asking or wanting too much from it. I'm being unrealistic. I've come across women with two ovaries who have gotten the same number of eggs from their cycles. I shouldn't be upset.
I guess it's not that I'm upset. I'm just disappointed. But then I remind myself, that the very best thing I can be doing right now to address this, is exactly what I'm doing right now. And that makes me feel a little bit better.
I think what's hard about the medication is how quickly I can get upset. I honestly don't notice any other side effects of the stimulation drugs. But when something happens that could possibly be upsetting, I feel like it's devastating. That could also be because this process is stressful in general. Obviously what anyone who is doing this wants is the most mature eggs as possible. It's frustrating to know you can't really do anything about it. What the scan shows is what your body has.
I keep reminding myself that if I had two ovaries, these would be really good results for someone who is almost 39. In fact, if I was getting twice the number, I would be pleased. So it's not really my body at fault. I'm simply asking or wanting too much from it. I'm being unrealistic. I've come across women with two ovaries who have gotten the same number of eggs from their cycles. I shouldn't be upset.
I guess it's not that I'm upset. I'm just disappointed. But then I remind myself, that the very best thing I can be doing right now to address this, is exactly what I'm doing right now. And that makes me feel a little bit better.
13 June 2013
Cycle 2: Day 1
So I went to the clinic today for my first scan and tonight is my first injection. I remembered to take the Gonal-F out of the fridge so it won't be too cold. My scan was fine. Not with my usual doctor as he's on holiday, but with his colleague who I've seen before. There wasn't much discussion or information. Just an 'all good' and a schedule for injections!
I had to pay the big bill today, but since I've already paid for my drugs, that should be most of the money done for two cycles now. I'll do a cost update at some point with all the costs. I was paying for the egg freezing and talking to the office manager and I complained about how my follow up appointment was not included and that I had to a) request it and b) pay for, on the last cycle. She agreed with me that it wasn't good but needs to talk about it with the doctors. Meaning, she couldn't give me anything for it, but I'm glad I complained.
I was also slightly distressed that my cycle seems to be coinciding with all of the doctors being busy or away. I tried to schedule my next scans and could only schedule the very next one, and a day after what I wanted. So my next (second) scan is on Tuesday. I really wanted Monday morning but there weren't any openings. This means I need to go up to Cambridge, come back from Cambridge, go back to Cambridge, and come back from Cambridge whereas I really just wanted to go up and come back once. Oh well. It's a minor inconvenience really. But the doctors being away is a bigger one. I'll find out more on Tuesday about when and with who my next scans are going to be. Not entirely pleased about it at the moment but I'm hoping it sorts itself out somehow.
Not much else to say yet. I did pick up a sharps bin from the clinic as I didn't get one with my drug delivery (even though I was supposed to). So at least that's sorted.
Right. I guess I better go get it done!
I had to pay the big bill today, but since I've already paid for my drugs, that should be most of the money done for two cycles now. I'll do a cost update at some point with all the costs. I was paying for the egg freezing and talking to the office manager and I complained about how my follow up appointment was not included and that I had to a) request it and b) pay for, on the last cycle. She agreed with me that it wasn't good but needs to talk about it with the doctors. Meaning, she couldn't give me anything for it, but I'm glad I complained.
I was also slightly distressed that my cycle seems to be coinciding with all of the doctors being busy or away. I tried to schedule my next scans and could only schedule the very next one, and a day after what I wanted. So my next (second) scan is on Tuesday. I really wanted Monday morning but there weren't any openings. This means I need to go up to Cambridge, come back from Cambridge, go back to Cambridge, and come back from Cambridge whereas I really just wanted to go up and come back once. Oh well. It's a minor inconvenience really. But the doctors being away is a bigger one. I'll find out more on Tuesday about when and with who my next scans are going to be. Not entirely pleased about it at the moment but I'm hoping it sorts itself out somehow.
Not much else to say yet. I did pick up a sharps bin from the clinic as I didn't get one with my drug delivery (even though I was supposed to). So at least that's sorted.
Right. I guess I better go get it done!
04 April 2013
Follow-Up Consultation
Today I had my fist meeting with the doctor since my collection. I am sad to report that I was charged for this visit. I feel that this is not ideal and that a single follow-up consultation should be standard with an egg collection procedure. But, you can't be pleased with everything. So the new update on costs is:
But it is what it is. Either I choose a different clinic, or I accept that this is how it is. Can't be pleased with everything. And overall I am really generally pleased. So I am going to stick with them.
So I saw my doctor today and we discussed how everything went and he did a scan to check on my ovary since I said that I could still feel it and I knew it had not gone back to normal size. I was of course concerned it was the cyst but I am happy to report that my cyst is still the same size as it was before and has not grown at all. On the other hand, my ovary is currently about twice it's normal size. The doctor said this was 'normal' and that it can take up to two period cycles for it to return to normal size. When stimulated it can be 7 or 8 times normal size. So my ovary has definitely 'gone down' but it's not all the way down yet. In keeping with this he suggested I stay away from impact exercise and twisting until I don't feel it anymore. I'm glad that I wasn't making it up that I still 'felt' the ovary and also glad I was taking it easy and not rushing back to the gym.
We discussed how the retrieval went. In the end there were 10 follicles and 6 had eggs and all 6 were mature. They can't tell you anything about the quality of those eggs. I asked if there was anything I could be doing now to help improve number or quality as there are many things talked about online. He said the only thing he suggested was that I consider some slow weight loss between now and my next procedure. That's fair. But he cautioned me it needs to be slow and steady, not a crash diet as that can negatively impact egg production or quality. So I need to be a bit more serious about seeing if I can lose 10-15 pounds in the next two months.
He said he felt the protocol was good and he didn't particularly want to change it. He said that as I only have the one ovary he didn't want to be too aggressive or risky because we want to protect the ovary as well. That seemed reasonable to me.
He gave me a prescription for my drugs and said they are happy for me to source them elsewhere if I can get them for cheaper, so that was good and I need to follow up with that over the next couple of weeks. He also said that my retrieval procedure was a bit tricky. That surprised me. I asked why and he said that my ovary moved around a lot during the retrieval. Apparently the dermoid cyst can make it wobbly or a bit less stable, or even float inside the gut, so apparently it wasn't exactly straightforward to retrieve my eggs.
So there you have it. I'll post more about drug pricing as I look into that. In the meantime I have 2 months to see if I can drop some weight. That's not going to be easy though if you consider I'm back in the States for 3 weeks in May. But I'll do the best I can.
| Previous total cost | £6876 |
| Follow-up consultation | £120 |
| Total cost to date | £6996 |
But it is what it is. Either I choose a different clinic, or I accept that this is how it is. Can't be pleased with everything. And overall I am really generally pleased. So I am going to stick with them.
So I saw my doctor today and we discussed how everything went and he did a scan to check on my ovary since I said that I could still feel it and I knew it had not gone back to normal size. I was of course concerned it was the cyst but I am happy to report that my cyst is still the same size as it was before and has not grown at all. On the other hand, my ovary is currently about twice it's normal size. The doctor said this was 'normal' and that it can take up to two period cycles for it to return to normal size. When stimulated it can be 7 or 8 times normal size. So my ovary has definitely 'gone down' but it's not all the way down yet. In keeping with this he suggested I stay away from impact exercise and twisting until I don't feel it anymore. I'm glad that I wasn't making it up that I still 'felt' the ovary and also glad I was taking it easy and not rushing back to the gym.
We discussed how the retrieval went. In the end there were 10 follicles and 6 had eggs and all 6 were mature. They can't tell you anything about the quality of those eggs. I asked if there was anything I could be doing now to help improve number or quality as there are many things talked about online. He said the only thing he suggested was that I consider some slow weight loss between now and my next procedure. That's fair. But he cautioned me it needs to be slow and steady, not a crash diet as that can negatively impact egg production or quality. So I need to be a bit more serious about seeing if I can lose 10-15 pounds in the next two months.
He said he felt the protocol was good and he didn't particularly want to change it. He said that as I only have the one ovary he didn't want to be too aggressive or risky because we want to protect the ovary as well. That seemed reasonable to me.
He gave me a prescription for my drugs and said they are happy for me to source them elsewhere if I can get them for cheaper, so that was good and I need to follow up with that over the next couple of weeks. He also said that my retrieval procedure was a bit tricky. That surprised me. I asked why and he said that my ovary moved around a lot during the retrieval. Apparently the dermoid cyst can make it wobbly or a bit less stable, or even float inside the gut, so apparently it wasn't exactly straightforward to retrieve my eggs.
So there you have it. I'll post more about drug pricing as I look into that. In the meantime I have 2 months to see if I can drop some weight. That's not going to be easy though if you consider I'm back in the States for 3 weeks in May. But I'll do the best I can.
22 February 2013
Day 13 - Scan
The end is in sight!
Had my scan this morning. The doctor said that Tuesday would really be better for collection as the goal is to have as many good eggs as possible and I do have some follicles lagging behind. I'm sure that I could question him for his reasoning and thinking, but as my IVF experienced friend said, "What is he going to tell you really except that this is what he thinks they should do based on all the other patients they've seen and the results they've had with different protocols?". It's true really. Whatever they say to me isn't going to be the magic pill that "promises" the prize. Either you trust your doctor, and the clinic, or you don't. So lesson of the day- be very happy with your clinic and doctor because that's really all you've got.
At any rate, he counted 13 follicles and there may have been a couple others. They are getting big! He suggested that I should be looking at 5-10 eggs. Of course there is a massive difference between 5 and 10. And there is absolutely nothing I can do about it except wait and see. Obviously I hope for 10 and I will be disappointed with 5 but it will be what it will be and lets just hope that it's not any less than that which is of course, also entirely possible.
So I have my final drugs now, and I need to be back at the clinic at 8:30am on Tuesday morning for my procedure at 9am and I might be able to go home by 10 and hopefully by 11.
Tonight, I'm on the same drugs as usual- Gonal-F at 225 and Cetrotide. Then tomorrow I do them again but the Gonal-F reduces (I have it written down- I think it's one eight something or other). Sunday at 7pm I take the Cetrotide and then at 8pm I do the Ovitrelle which came pre-packaged and is currently in my fridge waiting for me. Monday- no shots! Hooray! Before I head to the clinic on Tuesday morning, I take a suppository. I think it's a painkiller. I'm not sure, I'll need to double check, and I will post more about all that later.
This has of course prompted me to consider does the procedure actually hurt? It may sound stupid but it hadn't actually particularly occurred to me. Then of course I made the mistake of looking at the internet which is full of both sides- people in pain and people feeling nothing. Well, there just isn't any way to know what it's going to be like until it happens. I'd say my tolerance for pain can be pretty high, but I do tend to flinch. Hopefully I get enough sedation to just knock my ass out.
I've arranged for my friend to come meet me at the clinic and go home with me. It's all heading to the finish line now!
I did say to the doctor today that my ovary feels uncomfortable, my digestive system seems to be a mess, and I've been feeling particularly grumpy. He said it's all normal. At least I can be objective at the moment. The hormones haven't gotten that bad yet!!
Had my scan this morning. The doctor said that Tuesday would really be better for collection as the goal is to have as many good eggs as possible and I do have some follicles lagging behind. I'm sure that I could question him for his reasoning and thinking, but as my IVF experienced friend said, "What is he going to tell you really except that this is what he thinks they should do based on all the other patients they've seen and the results they've had with different protocols?". It's true really. Whatever they say to me isn't going to be the magic pill that "promises" the prize. Either you trust your doctor, and the clinic, or you don't. So lesson of the day- be very happy with your clinic and doctor because that's really all you've got.
At any rate, he counted 13 follicles and there may have been a couple others. They are getting big! He suggested that I should be looking at 5-10 eggs. Of course there is a massive difference between 5 and 10. And there is absolutely nothing I can do about it except wait and see. Obviously I hope for 10 and I will be disappointed with 5 but it will be what it will be and lets just hope that it's not any less than that which is of course, also entirely possible.
So I have my final drugs now, and I need to be back at the clinic at 8:30am on Tuesday morning for my procedure at 9am and I might be able to go home by 10 and hopefully by 11.
Tonight, I'm on the same drugs as usual- Gonal-F at 225 and Cetrotide. Then tomorrow I do them again but the Gonal-F reduces (I have it written down- I think it's one eight something or other). Sunday at 7pm I take the Cetrotide and then at 8pm I do the Ovitrelle which came pre-packaged and is currently in my fridge waiting for me. Monday- no shots! Hooray! Before I head to the clinic on Tuesday morning, I take a suppository. I think it's a painkiller. I'm not sure, I'll need to double check, and I will post more about all that later.
This has of course prompted me to consider does the procedure actually hurt? It may sound stupid but it hadn't actually particularly occurred to me. Then of course I made the mistake of looking at the internet which is full of both sides- people in pain and people feeling nothing. Well, there just isn't any way to know what it's going to be like until it happens. I'd say my tolerance for pain can be pretty high, but I do tend to flinch. Hopefully I get enough sedation to just knock my ass out.
I've arranged for my friend to come meet me at the clinic and go home with me. It's all heading to the finish line now!
I did say to the doctor today that my ovary feels uncomfortable, my digestive system seems to be a mess, and I've been feeling particularly grumpy. He said it's all normal. At least I can be objective at the moment. The hormones haven't gotten that bad yet!!
20 February 2013
Day 11 - Scan
So I had a scan this morning with a different doctor. All going well. I saw her count ten follicles and I saw a few more she didn't count. She said it was good that they were mostly growing uniformly- that there weren't one or two 'ahead of the pack' in terms of growth which is good. I guess they try to generally measure only the biggest ones. She said they were also growing at a regular and steady and desirable rate. So that was also all good. The sad news is she said my collection could be Monday or even Tuesday. It just keeps getting pushed further away!! Ugh! I hate the waiting!!!
Also this means I need to try to rearrange my "support" person as the person I had lined up is only free Thursday and Friday. I think I've arranged someone though, so that's good.
I'm staying on the same dose of Gonal-F (225) plus the Cetrotide.
I asked if I was at any risk of OSHH. The doctor told me that she didn't think so- especially as I had only one ovary. If I had two ovaries, then maybe. I thought this was interesting as I haven't seen anything about OHSS risks being reduced by having one ovary, but hey, I'll take it.
I learned the leftover injection pen and vials can go directly into the trash. I'm not sure I 100% believe this, but the nurse said that they just put it all in regular trash so I can put it in my trash at home. So I guess I will, even though it feels vaguely wrong.
Also, I learned that the clinic does see patients on the weekend for procedures- but they don't do scans and regular consultations on the weekend. That seemed reasonable.
I definitely feel a tightness or pressure on my right side where my ovary is. It's mildly annoying but not painful. I can't say I've really had any other side effects that I've noticed. I have some mild bruising across my belly from all the shots, but it's not that bad, and not painful.
Just back to shots and waiting...
Also this means I need to try to rearrange my "support" person as the person I had lined up is only free Thursday and Friday. I think I've arranged someone though, so that's good.
I'm staying on the same dose of Gonal-F (225) plus the Cetrotide.
I asked if I was at any risk of OSHH. The doctor told me that she didn't think so- especially as I had only one ovary. If I had two ovaries, then maybe. I thought this was interesting as I haven't seen anything about OHSS risks being reduced by having one ovary, but hey, I'll take it.
I learned the leftover injection pen and vials can go directly into the trash. I'm not sure I 100% believe this, but the nurse said that they just put it all in regular trash so I can put it in my trash at home. So I guess I will, even though it feels vaguely wrong.
Also, I learned that the clinic does see patients on the weekend for procedures- but they don't do scans and regular consultations on the weekend. That seemed reasonable.
I definitely feel a tightness or pressure on my right side where my ovary is. It's mildly annoying but not painful. I can't say I've really had any other side effects that I've noticed. I have some mild bruising across my belly from all the shots, but it's not that bad, and not painful.
Just back to shots and waiting...
18 February 2013
Day 9 - Scan
Back from the doctor, had a good chat with him about the whole cyst thing. He showed me how a (my) dermoid cyst looks a lot like the bowel. Because my dermoid cyst is very small, it can be difficult to spot. It is able to seen now because the ovary is enlarged. It "moves" with the ovary. But, when the ovary is smaller it can be hard to see from the surrounding gut. He reiterated that it's very small and nothing to be concerned about. So I feel much better about all of that.
On to more exciting news! Follicles! Now I see from reading other blogs that people get measurements on their follicles and I don't know what mine are. So I can't say if I have good size ones or not. I know they are growing though, because the doctor says so! However, they are growing slowly. So instead of collection being Thursday or Friday this week, I may be looking at Monday. Which frankly, sort of sucks. But I'm going in for another scan on Wednesday and then again on Friday. So this is going to be a very busy week for my vagina. :)
I was careful to count the follicles he was measuring- so he measured 8 but he didn't measure a bunch that were on the other side. So I counted ten or eleven follicles. Obviously some are bigger than others. Anyway, from everything I can gather, this seems like a good foundation. So I'm excited. I just now wish the little eggs would mature faster!
Obviously I'll find out more on Wednesday. Unfortunately I don't see my regular doctor but I'll see another doctor in the clinic. Although I'm not concerned about that. I'm scheduled to see my regular doctor again on Friday. I have this sneaking suspicion that perhaps they aren't open over the weekend? I hope that's not the case as it would upset me to think that my collection is predicated on what is best for the doctor's schedule and not what's best for my body when I'm paying a lot of money for this. But that's me making a gross assumption. I'll not worry about that until Wednesday, when I'll try to glean more.
Oh, also, this longer stimulation time is a little bit annoying on the budget. At this rate I'm going to be paying an extra 50-60% for the expensive drugs because I'm going more days than I thought. In the grand scheme of things, it's okay, but it's a little bit annoying and I wasn't necessarily prepared for that length of extension. I'm figuring it will be an extra £600 (~$900) per cycle. Across two cycles, it's something to think about. But hey-ho, in for a penny in for a pound!
Oh yeah, last thing- when I asked about the break between cycles the doctor said that after collection my period would hopefully come around the 11th of March. Then April, then May, and THEN I could consider the next cycle. So assuming everything goes as planned, my second cycle will be June. Which gives me a good amount of time to relax and have fun in between. Of course the doctor says to me "One step at a time!". But I am a busy person and I need to schedule!!
Tonight, the further adventures of the human pin-cushion. I'm still staying on Gonal-F at 225 with the Cetrotide.
On to more exciting news! Follicles! Now I see from reading other blogs that people get measurements on their follicles and I don't know what mine are. So I can't say if I have good size ones or not. I know they are growing though, because the doctor says so! However, they are growing slowly. So instead of collection being Thursday or Friday this week, I may be looking at Monday. Which frankly, sort of sucks. But I'm going in for another scan on Wednesday and then again on Friday. So this is going to be a very busy week for my vagina. :)
I was careful to count the follicles he was measuring- so he measured 8 but he didn't measure a bunch that were on the other side. So I counted ten or eleven follicles. Obviously some are bigger than others. Anyway, from everything I can gather, this seems like a good foundation. So I'm excited. I just now wish the little eggs would mature faster!
Obviously I'll find out more on Wednesday. Unfortunately I don't see my regular doctor but I'll see another doctor in the clinic. Although I'm not concerned about that. I'm scheduled to see my regular doctor again on Friday. I have this sneaking suspicion that perhaps they aren't open over the weekend? I hope that's not the case as it would upset me to think that my collection is predicated on what is best for the doctor's schedule and not what's best for my body when I'm paying a lot of money for this. But that's me making a gross assumption. I'll not worry about that until Wednesday, when I'll try to glean more.
Oh, also, this longer stimulation time is a little bit annoying on the budget. At this rate I'm going to be paying an extra 50-60% for the expensive drugs because I'm going more days than I thought. In the grand scheme of things, it's okay, but it's a little bit annoying and I wasn't necessarily prepared for that length of extension. I'm figuring it will be an extra £600 (~$900) per cycle. Across two cycles, it's something to think about. But hey-ho, in for a penny in for a pound!
Oh yeah, last thing- when I asked about the break between cycles the doctor said that after collection my period would hopefully come around the 11th of March. Then April, then May, and THEN I could consider the next cycle. So assuming everything goes as planned, my second cycle will be June. Which gives me a good amount of time to relax and have fun in between. Of course the doctor says to me "One step at a time!". But I am a busy person and I need to schedule!!
Tonight, the further adventures of the human pin-cushion. I'm still staying on Gonal-F at 225 with the Cetrotide.
15 February 2013
14 February 2013
Day 4 - Scan Day
Today's entry is in two parts. First, the scan.
Today I had my first scan after 3 days of injections. I could see the screen as he looked at my ovary and measured the little follicles that were there. I counted about 7 or so. Two were clearly bigger, which I assume is a good thing. I will never get used to the UK doctor approach which is basically not very talkative. I prefer the continual information dump and running commentary approach. I suppose it's in part what I'm used to, but you know, I like to be included in my medical health discussion. Not that I have any complaints at all about the clinic- or the doctor for that matter. As when I ask him stuff, he is happy to answer and discuss with me. It's just that I need to ask, it doesn't happen automatically, and I find it a little bit weird.
So as I say, I saw him measuring all the little follicles. I sort of lost count, I swear he measured some of the same ones twice. But he was also very quick. It was definitely more than 5 although some were small. So he said I should stay on the same dose of the Gonal-F (225) and tonight I also add the Cetrotide. My next scan is Friday morning. He didn't see any cysts (which is good). He said it all looked like what he'd like to see so far (without being particularly descriptive about what it is he likes to see). He said that the trick is that they wouldn't want to overstimulate the ovary- you don't want 20 follicles on one ovary. But that a good response would hopefully see me get 10. If I actually got 10 eggs (and if those could all be frozen) that would be superb, because two cycles would give me the magic number of 20. I'm not sure I'll actually get 10 freezable eggs, but the closer I can get to that number the better.
It's kind of crazy to think I'm just back there in less than 2 days, but the more scans, the more information, the more care and looking at I'm getting, then the better as far as I can tell. So like I said, I'm very pleased with the clinic so far really. Oh, they said that my unused needles should all go in the sharps bin and that any unused medicine or medicine containers I can bring in and they can dispose of. So that was good to know. Although today they took the unused needles in the Gonal-F box, even though they say on their handout that they don't take unused needles not in a sharps bin. I don't think it was a big deal really.
I'm writing this in a cafe just now. I'll return to it later tonight when I discuss my shots. The regular Gonal-F and the new part of the regimen, mixing my own Cetrotide.
Okay, I wrote that part before and I'm picking up this post where I left off. My intention had been to take pictures and post about the mixing but I got home late so I just wanted to get the shots done to stay close to my schedule. I took the Gonal-F about 45 minutes after my 24 hour time and the Cetrotide about 15 minutes after that. All within reason to be fair, but I was just conscious about getting it done.
And what an annoyance last night was! First, I did the Gonal-F. I figured I had it down, I understood what I was doing, and it's easy. So I prep, I measure, I inject, I wait ten seconds, take the pen out.... and it says 25 left in the black window. Crap! If it has a number left it means you didn't take the full injection. But I did depress the plunger all the way (or so I thought). So I was first annoyed, then worried, then I just decided to give myself the 25 with a new needle. So I did that and it definitely went to 0. But it was an extra little bit of bother when I was already just trying to get it done! Ugh! Also, two pin pricks. Double ugh!
Or, make that three pin pricks. Because I had to mix up the Cetrotide. This was more complicated than I thought it was going to be. I will take a picture of the box set up hopefully for day 5 and post more about the mixing. Needless to say, there were a number of steps, it didn't all dissolve straight away so I kept trying to mix it without shaking it (as that adds air bubbles). Getting it back into the syringe was also not 'obvious' and I got a bit of air in there and I'm not convinced I got 100% of the drug back in the needle (although I did get most of it) and then I had to do yet another injection although that went fine when I finally got to that point, I was just glad to get it done!
Now my next scan is first thing Friday morning. I look forward to getting more information on how this is all going. It would be good to have an idea of what day collection might be for- as I need to figure out who I know that can come with me. If it's Thursday or Friday I have someone but if it's Wednesday, I might be on my own. I think that's the only shitty thing about this whole exercise- is really being on your own. It's part of the reason I don't find as much help from the IVF blogs- they're all with partners, they have different objectives, it's really a different sort of procedure and expectation. Egg freezing is similar, but it's different. I wish more women were sharing their stories!!
Today I had my first scan after 3 days of injections. I could see the screen as he looked at my ovary and measured the little follicles that were there. I counted about 7 or so. Two were clearly bigger, which I assume is a good thing. I will never get used to the UK doctor approach which is basically not very talkative. I prefer the continual information dump and running commentary approach. I suppose it's in part what I'm used to, but you know, I like to be included in my medical health discussion. Not that I have any complaints at all about the clinic- or the doctor for that matter. As when I ask him stuff, he is happy to answer and discuss with me. It's just that I need to ask, it doesn't happen automatically, and I find it a little bit weird.
So as I say, I saw him measuring all the little follicles. I sort of lost count, I swear he measured some of the same ones twice. But he was also very quick. It was definitely more than 5 although some were small. So he said I should stay on the same dose of the Gonal-F (225) and tonight I also add the Cetrotide. My next scan is Friday morning. He didn't see any cysts (which is good). He said it all looked like what he'd like to see so far (without being particularly descriptive about what it is he likes to see). He said that the trick is that they wouldn't want to overstimulate the ovary- you don't want 20 follicles on one ovary. But that a good response would hopefully see me get 10. If I actually got 10 eggs (and if those could all be frozen) that would be superb, because two cycles would give me the magic number of 20. I'm not sure I'll actually get 10 freezable eggs, but the closer I can get to that number the better.
It's kind of crazy to think I'm just back there in less than 2 days, but the more scans, the more information, the more care and looking at I'm getting, then the better as far as I can tell. So like I said, I'm very pleased with the clinic so far really. Oh, they said that my unused needles should all go in the sharps bin and that any unused medicine or medicine containers I can bring in and they can dispose of. So that was good to know. Although today they took the unused needles in the Gonal-F box, even though they say on their handout that they don't take unused needles not in a sharps bin. I don't think it was a big deal really.
I'm writing this in a cafe just now. I'll return to it later tonight when I discuss my shots. The regular Gonal-F and the new part of the regimen, mixing my own Cetrotide.
Okay, I wrote that part before and I'm picking up this post where I left off. My intention had been to take pictures and post about the mixing but I got home late so I just wanted to get the shots done to stay close to my schedule. I took the Gonal-F about 45 minutes after my 24 hour time and the Cetrotide about 15 minutes after that. All within reason to be fair, but I was just conscious about getting it done.
And what an annoyance last night was! First, I did the Gonal-F. I figured I had it down, I understood what I was doing, and it's easy. So I prep, I measure, I inject, I wait ten seconds, take the pen out.... and it says 25 left in the black window. Crap! If it has a number left it means you didn't take the full injection. But I did depress the plunger all the way (or so I thought). So I was first annoyed, then worried, then I just decided to give myself the 25 with a new needle. So I did that and it definitely went to 0. But it was an extra little bit of bother when I was already just trying to get it done! Ugh! Also, two pin pricks. Double ugh!
Or, make that three pin pricks. Because I had to mix up the Cetrotide. This was more complicated than I thought it was going to be. I will take a picture of the box set up hopefully for day 5 and post more about the mixing. Needless to say, there were a number of steps, it didn't all dissolve straight away so I kept trying to mix it without shaking it (as that adds air bubbles). Getting it back into the syringe was also not 'obvious' and I got a bit of air in there and I'm not convinced I got 100% of the drug back in the needle (although I did get most of it) and then I had to do yet another injection although that went fine when I finally got to that point, I was just glad to get it done!
Now my next scan is first thing Friday morning. I look forward to getting more information on how this is all going. It would be good to have an idea of what day collection might be for- as I need to figure out who I know that can come with me. If it's Thursday or Friday I have someone but if it's Wednesday, I might be on my own. I think that's the only shitty thing about this whole exercise- is really being on your own. It's part of the reason I don't find as much help from the IVF blogs- they're all with partners, they have different objectives, it's really a different sort of procedure and expectation. Egg freezing is similar, but it's different. I wish more women were sharing their stories!!
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